I don't know if there's anything more frustrating than being broke. It is always difficult to not have any money to spend, but moreso when it is self-inflicted through a series of poor financial decisions, particularly regarding vehicle loans, credit cards, and lines of credit. Slowly, but steadily those choices creep up in the form of higher and higher payments until all of your money becomes tied up in minimum monthly payments. Throw in an ankle injury resulting in lower workman's comp wages and an unpaid maternity leave, and you find yourself treading water, barely able to stay afloat.
Determined to end this cycle and climb out from the massive sinkhole that is debt, you find yourself further inundated with ways to spend your money. For it is not easy to live entirely thrifty; it requries much forethought, energy and time to produce cost-effective meals at home, and somehow come up with entertainment to at least help from not feeling so deprived. More often than not, that means staying in and watching television, and being subjected to endless advertisements, particularly for fast food. I have come to realize that commercials are money well-spent for the companies who use them - they work! I feel most destitute when all I want is some "Good Mood Food" and I know there is no way I can get it.
Feeling this way only heightens the struggle as I do not want to fall victim to the cunning of marketers; I do not want to be a part of our highly materialistic society, nor do I want to pass that on to my children. But as we all know, it is much easier said than it is done.
Somehow, someday, we will figure out a happy medium where we are living within our means and not relying on credit to get us by, but for now we must live very prudently so that we may do so in the future. We must sacrifice now so that we can get out from under this completely and make sure we never fall victim to our spontaneous wants again.
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